silver eyes
by fiiiceeer
Summary: my version of draco's childhood. AU


Watching

I've spent my life in tall towers watching the world go by. My father always hated that. He felt it made me a weirdo. At home I liked the north tower. I'd get their early and watch the servants run around the yard doing their duties. I used to think they were happy because they had so much energy to run around so early when it was cold. I was to young to realise my father made them, I didn't understand that we oppressed them or that they hated us all I did was watch. One day, I spotted a new servant. Usually I took no notice of new faces instead I would watch the servant Barda the big man who feed and trained the blood hounds or Matilda who was the mother farm maid. But this girl I notice and began to watch.

It was her age at first that attracted me. She was the youngest servant we had. She looked no older then seven. I was 6 at the time and always surrounded by the adults of the house so seeing someone my own age was rare. She was so quiet and humble if she'd been any older I would have ignored her. I named her Cate for her age and innocents. She became my favourite servant to watch, because unlike the others who I thought were happy, Cate was very obviously sad. I don't know how I knew, maybe it was child body language or that she was too young to hide her feelings like the rest of them.

When I felt sad about anything I would scream and chuck tantrums that would shake the house down. Soon I'd be covered in presents from my mother in her vain effort to stop my tantrums. The only thing that every snapped me out of them was when my father came home. He'd only look at me, that look that said "if you continue this, I won't love you." My father never understood the phrase unconditional love.

Cate never had tantrums. She bore her unhappiness quietly, rarely speaking to anyone besides to get the key to the food store. The only indication she ever showed me happened one morning when I'd made my way to the north tower earlier then usual. Cate was standing in the middle of the yard the hounds casually ignoring her. She was facing the Manor and I could see the glint of tears on her cheeks. She was crying silently, tears dripping down her face, reflecting the growing light from the east. I realised in that moment that I was in love with her. No-one would believe me, how can a six year old possibly love. All I knew was it was toucher to sit up in my warm tower watching Cate cry to the cold night. But there was nothing I could do. I was trapped in my own house. The guards kept watch on the door out of the manor. I couldn't go and comfort Cate. But I swore to myself that day that I'd find her in the morning I'd tell her that I loved her and that she didn't have to cry anymore.

I watched her wipe her face and return to the servants quarters the moment she stepped in the door the cock crowed to wake the rest of the servants. Around 5 minuets later Barda moved from the servant's quarters and called the hounds to him giving them little mean treats and leading them back to their cage. Once they were safely out of the way, the rest of the early morning servants exited the servant's quarters. Two fresh guards walked around the manor to replace the night guards. Matilda walked in the direction of the food store Cate following in her wake. Cate showed no sign of her early morning outing, she even looked happier then usual. A slight smile played across her lips. I even wondered if it was possible that she'd read my mind and knew I loved her. Matilda opened the food store and passed Cate the pig and hen feed as well as the basket Cate used to collect the eggs. I watched her shatter the hen feed and then sneak into there little house to steal the eggs. Once she was inside the hen house I left the Tower and headed down to breakfast knowing that today I'd be talking to the sad girl I loved.

That morning I sat at the breakfast table my father had had guests over who I was to call Mr and Mrs Parkinson. I knew there daughter Pansy she had accompanied the Parkinson's on other visits. The girl was nice enough, pretty to but when I showed her the north tower she seemed confused by it and asked me why you would care what the servants did. She didn't understand the interest I had in other people.

Mr and Mrs Parkinson didn't talk to me, I was too young to be concerned with there business. My Mother had taught me that in these circumstances I was to sit quietly and politely eating slowly and carefully using all the manners appropriate to the Malfoy family. I hated it, it was boring, but I'd learnt swiftly that if I were to complain or ignore my Mothers instructions in this instance my Father would not be forgiving. Despite eating slowly and carefully, my small hands rather clumsy with the heavy silver cutlery I still finished eating long before the others. Thus I was forced to endure sitting quietly while the adults talked in words I didn't understand about issues that did not concern me. There was never anything to look at in the dinning room. The Servants that served us breakfast were told to return to the kitchen as soon as they'd finished serving. Unless someone asked for more they would not return till we had vacated the room. It was one of my fathers sayings good children are scene but not heard and good servants are neither scene or heard. After what seemed like hours the Parkinson's and my parents finished and I was told I could play in the yard until my lessons started at ten.

The first thing I did was check the big grandfather clock in the hall it like many things in the house was ancient. My Mother had said that it had been in the family for three hundred years, its upkeep done by the house elves the only magical servants my father trusted to live so close to our family. It told me the time was half past eight. That was perfect as it was the yard servants breakfast time. Cate along with the others would be sitting down for breakfast they had ten minuets which they spent eating and then usually sat out in the yard talking until nine o'clock when they went back to work. After their eating time would be the perfect time to talk to Cate and it gave me a good ten minuets to get prepared.

The only romance I'd ever scene was between my parents. My earliest memory was when I was three it'd been there wedding anniversary and my father had bought my mother a gold bracelet. Before he'd given it to her he'd come up to my room, sat me on his lap and told me that I was very lucky to have a mother like her and he was blessed with having her as his wife. He told me that when I grew to be a man, I must find a wife as good as her. He said that there would be many temptations out there but that I must be cautious I didn't end up with the wrong sort. My Mother had entered the room and had appeared surprised to see my father there. He hardly ever visited my room. She had smiled at the picture of her son sitting on his lap. My Father beckoned her over and she sat next to us on my bed. He gave her the Jewry box containing the gold bracelet and said "happy anniversary my dearest" he'd kissed her on the cheek. My Mother had seemed very happy to receive that gift and to this day it has never left her wrist.

I knew I needed to give Cate something to let her know I loved her. I'd heard in the stories my governess had read me that girls liked pretty flowers and Jewry. So I took the silver cufflinks my Aunt Mrs LaStange, had given me for my 4th birthday, they were magically charmed to never get lost and picked her two blue roses. I liked the blue roses best as they looked like the sky in summer my favourite season. Now that I was confident that she would like the gifts. I hurried to over the thin layer of snow to the place behind the hen house where I knew she liked to sit after breakfast. I hurried so fast that I slipped over on the snow and crushed the flowers. Not really noticing in my excitement I got up and kept running. I was oblivious to the looks of amazement on the servants faces at seeing their young master running across the grounds to the hen house with a couple of broken flowers in his hand. Never the less none of them got in the way lest it set off one of my awful tantrums and have them fired.

When I reached the hen house I stopped running to catch my breath. I dusted the snow off my cloak and from my hair. Being a Malfoy I knew how important appearance was, even when talking to just a servant. I walked around to the other side of the hen house at first I didn't see her. I wondered if she hadn't arrived yet, but then I saw her she was lying face down in the snow. I in my innocents assumed she was asleep. I walked over to wake her up and tell her about my love when someone stopped me. It was Barda, the big mans hand was on my shoulder. "I think Master Malfoy you should return to the house."

"why, I wanna talk to Cate" I said frustrated that my romantic expedition had been bought short. Barda looked confused for a second "Well there is no Cate out here, so you should return to the house"

"Don't be silly, Cate's right there" I pointed to the sleeping girl. Struggling out of his grasp I ran over to the sleeping girl. I shook her, she didn't waken, I felt mildly annoyed at her for it. I turned her over, I was only when I saw her eyes wide open that I realised how cold she was and the fact that the snow surrounding her was blood red. Barda walked over and picked me up.

I struggled but the big man held me firm, still not believing the obvious, I screamed at him, "Put me down, she must wake up." Barda was a wise man and he knew that if he didn't put me down I'd start a tantrum, and then he'd have to deal with Mister Malfoy who no drought would order him out of the house. He walked around the hen house till the girls body was out of view, stood me on the snow, placed both hands on my shoulders and said "Master Malfoy the girl you refer to as Cate is dead, there is nothing you can do, now return to the house and say no more of this."

For a moment I just looked at him, tears welled up in my eyes and before I knew it I was screaming and yelling and kicking the ground. This of corse brought my Mother and Father rushing to the yard. My mother rushed over and tried to get me to stop, she held me telling me that boys don't cry and that it was ok. My father told my mother to stand aside. He pulled me to my feet and looked me strait in the eyes. "Draco you will stop this carry-on or you are no longer a Malfoy." Suddenly Cate didn't matter anymore. My tears dried up and I was embarrassed at my dismembered state in front of my father. "I'm sorry Father" I said.

"You should be" was all he said to me

"Narcissi take him inside and lock him in his room"

My Mother took my hand, I was only at this point did I notice the Parkinsons watching, Mr Parkinson seemed to be enjoying the display while Mrs Parkinson seemed offended.

As I was pulled inside by my Mother I heard my Father say "You, what happened" he must've been asking Barda.

Once in my room my mother looked at me, "Draco, what on earth possessed you to act that way, we have guests over"

"She's dead mother, she died, I never got to tell her"

"Who's dead Draco"

"Cate"

My mother looked at me blankly "Who?"

"The servant girl, the one who steals the hen's eggs."

My mother still looked blank "draco do you talk to the servants?"

"No I watch them"

"Then what were you going to tell her"

"I wanted to tell her that I loved her so she didn't have to cry anymore"

"Draco don't be stupid you did not love a servant, she is just a servant, no Malfoy ever loved a servant" with that she left the room, whispering a locking charm and shaking her head.

I never found out what they did with her body. I didn't dare ask. But i realised after my mother had left me that i still held one crushed blue rose and my charmed silver cufflinks. I hope that the other flower is with her, i don't know why it just seems fitting.


End file.
